The Unintentional Traditions

Over the years I have been intentional about establishing family traditions as we work to build memories for our kids.  Recently, we discussed favorite traditions in a group setting.  Savannah was with me, so I asked her if we have any traditions.  She responded with talking about how Mary and Joseph travel through the house to the manger, and the nativity stays up until Easter because there is no Christmas without Easter.  Savannah also pointed out an unintentional tradition.  She talked about how everyone loses their excitement over decorating the tree by the time I finish the lights after hours of work.  I may be a bit of a perfectionist on this.  I like lots of lights evenly dispersed throughout the tree. She remembers that Andy is usually sent to the store for new lights about halfway through the process because I start finding strands that no longer work.  Don't tell Andy this, but after following that tradition this year, I found unopened sets of lights from last year's journey out for more.  Oops.

While I don't necessarily like our unintentional tradition, I have to admit that we do and will laugh over it, so that makes it kind of special.

Our other traditions include stockings stuffed by Santa for each of the kids and one additional gift from Santa.  Santa's gifts come wrapped in Santa paper, and they are the only ones that do. Santa typically does not bring the most wished for item on the wish list. I have heard it said by parents that they don't want to do Santa because they want to avoid the greed. I think you can do Santa without the greed. Make him a minor player in your Christmas tradition. You can still have the fun without the pressure and without losing the true meaning of the holiday. Andy and I give each of the kids two gifts.  We read the Christmas story before opening gifts (or someone recites it from memory as Julia did this year).  Christmas day is a lazy day around here.  We stay home and have a nice meal together.  Everyone naps whenever they want. We might play a game or watch a movie, but it is generally just the six of us unless someone stops by which is always fun.

We always gather with my side of the family on Christmas Eve.  We are a big bunch.  We all buy for Dad since years ago Mom said she could not buy for just one of her children and did not want to go in the name drawing.  The siblings, spouses and adult grandchildren (that's only Zach for now) draw names for a gift with a $30 limit.  Everyone contributes to a big joint gift or buys an individual gift for each of the grandchildren - that's a total of 9 for now since Zach is no longer included in this.  I think Austin may be joining Zach next year, but maybe we will have a new addition too (none on the way to my knowledge).  We keep the food simple.  We always have a birthday cake for Jesus.  Otherwise, we might order pizza, or as we did this year, have a potluck feast of appetizers and desserts.  This is generally hosted at my Dad's house, but we hosted this year and think we might continue that.  It was easier on us.

Sometimes traditions change a bit.  We used to always decorate the house the Sunday after Thanksgiving.  We wait an extra week now because we buy a live tree and want it to survive through Christmas. I used to find decorating the Sunday after Thanksgiving to be very tiring, but Andy insisted. I like waiting an extra week.  I used to take everything down on New Year's Day.  Now, I undress the tree shortly after it stops drinking water.  I usually take down the rest of the decor over a few days.  I like this much better: little bits at a time are less daunting and allow us to enjoy it a little longer.

Celebrating with Andy's family has some unintentional traditions too.  We typically gather at our house on New Year's Eve to celebrate.  However, weather, an injury, and conflicting schedules have derailed that over the last few years.  The unintentional result is that not everyone is together at the same time.  That is a bit awkward as we also draw names among the adults on his side of the family, and everyone buys for the kids.  We have had people opening gifts and people without gifts during our disjointed gatherings, but we are remedying that this year.  We plan to return to our long-standing tradition and gather on New Year's Eve.  Our meal will likely be a themed meal, possibly mediterranean. 

 I add traditions when I find something appealing.  For years we added a new piece to our nativity set each year.  It was not something I could afford all at once, so we built it slowly.  I think I might still add a couple more shepherds and another animal or two though I did not add anything this year.  Last year, I found a great ornament to recap the year. http://www.personalizationmall.com/Personalized-Christmas-Ornaments-Family-Home-p13122.prod?sdest=Search&sdestid=38727447

I waited until January to order ours, and that was great because I included playing with baby tigers on it which we did not do until the very end of the year.  I plan to order one again this year, and hopefully they will be available for years to come.  If not, then I will roll up our memories on strips of paper and place them in one of those clear ball ornaments, decorate it with some glittery fabric paint and make an annual keepsake ornament that way. Yes, we do have plenty of ornaments, but one day, and it is fast approaching, my kids will start moving out of the house.  I will let them take any of the ornaments they collected over the years with them, but I will still want the ornaments on my tree to reflect family memories.

What about you?  What are your intentional and unintentional traditions?