The Third Parent

Savannah moved into her summer home today. We launched her into this mission/internship with a dinner provided by a sponsoring church - a delicious Cuban meal, I should add.  She's excited about the next 11 weeks!


We only got her home for three weeks, and I would like to say we made that time extra special and loved on her, but the reality is that May is a crazy month.  Since I am now the sole librarian at my school, my May workload has almost doubled.  With testing season I am often forced to work longer hours (illegal and without pay, I might add -not because I mind, I am willing to do what is best for the kids, but just to remind my readers that the demands on educators are not as little as the politicians and public at large would have you think).  Andy's job is always demanding, and then there are all the evening commitments with end of year activities.

Instead of loving on Savannah, she loved on us.  She drove our non-drivers to places we could not because of conflicting schedules.  When I was overwhelmed and exhausted, she went to multiple stores to find Wyatt a pair of pants he needed.  She took Julia shoe shopping (that, on it's own, is worthy of some kind of award).  She took Wyatt to have his glasses adjusted and offered to take him to a lengthy appointment so that I would not have to miss work since my sick time is being capped in December.  I took Wyatt to that appointment, by the way.  It was generous of Savannah to offer, but he needed a parent there- preferably both, but Andy could not make it happen.  During finals week Savannah picked Wyatt up from school every day since finals are only in the morning, and students only have to report to the classes where they have finals scheduled.  True to her nature, Savannah came home and served.

We all make commitments to ourselves over what we will and will not do in parenting. I remember thinking that I wanted my children close enough in age to each other that they couldn't be responsible for each other.  I sometimes resented the long summer days where I was stuck inside babysitting while my friends were free to roam the neighborhood or the sail boating adventure I missed because I was needed at home to babysit.  In hindsight I don't regret any of it because I think it taught me responsibility and pushed me to pursue my goals.  In the end I think it also taught me how to be a mom.  I don't get it right a lot of the time, but a recent conversation with Savannah revealed what God did do through Andy and me.

She also got some much needed rest.  Savannah did not work during this time, so she had her days while everyone was at work, school, or sleeping to herself.

20 girls, 3 working bathrooms, 1 Victorian mansion

1st world problems

Are my teenagers from outer space?

Here's our Memorial Day weekend recap:

Wyatt had been counting down the days until the pool opened.  Saturday was an iffy day for it with t-storms threatened.  However, he waited all day long while we ran errands and finally got that dip in the pool.  He was so excited!

We enjoyed a family night around the fire pit with S'mores.  It makes this momma's heart so happy to have them all in one place enjoying each other. I don't know what it says about us that we played an A-Z game on ways you could die and followed that with an A-Z game on ways you could die in Star Wars.  I know, now you have this in your head and are thinking of what your answers would be.

On Sunday we hung out with family celebrating my nephew's birthday.  He wanted a practical joke kit, so his dad delivered with Whoopsie cushions, fake poop, a can that when opened has a snake pop out, and other such goodies.  Those gifts were the hit of the party.    I could not help but think of Dad.  He would have gotten the biggest kick out of all the kids and their antics with that stuff.  Ira would probably have tons more today because Dad would have thought it so much fun.  Ira is his grandfather's grandson.  He looks just like him.  Face recognition software tags my dad when Ira is in the picture.  Now we see that he acts a lot like him too.

Who can help themselves around a six year old's belly laugh?  You can't help but have fun.  I asked Savannah if she had opened the can that he thought was so funny.  She said she hadn't because she had already seen it opened.  Not the point.  You have to open the can and play along so that you can get a kick out of Ira's reaction.


On Monday we went to a military enshrinement ceremony where my best friend from high school's husband was enshrined.  It was a very nice ceremony that capped off a weekend at TAPPs for her and her children.

We finished the weekend with a family outing to see Star Wars - The Han Solo Story or whatever it's called.   Julia has neither seen a Star Wars movie before nor had any desire to do so.  I didn't expect her to go, but she did because she didn't realize it was a Star Wars movie.  She liked it okay.  Wyatt has seen all the movies and did not go.  What?!  I have also been hitting Memorial Day sales to stock Julia up on shorts.  I have gone Nike with her everyday shorts because they are  much more modest than the off brands.  She chose a pair of shorts in the colors of the rival team of her favorite college basketball team.  They look like they were made for that team.  Say what?!  She's quit cheerleading and swimming and now this?  Where is my daughter, and who is this space alien?  Then there's the Wyatt Star Wars thing.  Just when you think you kind of understand teenagers...

She crossed over!

You've seen the sneaks, now for the real thing!

Julia officially left middle school this week, and for a few days while Wyatt finishes finals, we have two freshmen in the house.

It was a weeknight and regular workday for me.  Julia has been wanting a photo shoot with two of her friends since she entered a contest to win one.  We were able to get in a mini-shoot before the ceremony with one of the girls, but the other one couldn't make it. I have a feeling they will be getting dressed up and trying this again sometime.  

CALMS approved..their new principal calls the middle school CALMS

All the siblings showed up.  

two freshmen - for a few days anyway

Sweet friendships were celebrated.

Throwing it back to kindergarten graduation which was the same day Zach crossed over to high school.

Final Thoughts

The ceremony: I do not know how Crossover has morphed into what it is today.  The venue and ceremony have not changed at all since Zach celebrated his Crossover a few years ago, but the dress certainly has.  What used to be a mildly dressy ceremony has become dressier.  Note that Zach is wearing a polo in the picture from his day.  This week the boys wore bow ties and jackets and some wore polos.  The girls, for the most part, wore long dresses.  The dresses are not meant to be formal.  It's just very hard to meet the dress code.  Dresses have to come to the knee and cannot show off shoulders, so no spaghetti straps or sleeveless attire.  Girls who wore dresses like Julia's covered themselves with sweaters for the ceremony.  If you have been involved in buying clothes for teenage girls at all, you know that finding dresses of an appropriate length is very challenging even for the shortest girls.  It's easier to buy long dresses.

The only notable change for this ceremony is that it took place at night.  I have asked the school for years to make this change and plan to send them a thank you.  In the past I had to find a way to take off work at a difficult time to do so.  I do know that the ceremony was changed because of scheduling conflicts with the venue rather than my request.  I am not that important!

Awards: Julia received the Bible Achievement Award which is an award chosen by the teacher for the student who works particularly hard in that class giving their all.  This award is given to only one of the teacher's students.  Julia also made the Principal's Honor Roll for all As, all year.  

It's chaos after the ceremony. It took such a long time to find Julia that I got very few pictures of her with friends after the event.  It has certainly been a nostalgic few days for me as I ponder this move into high school. I know all too well that high school goes far too fast!

Go on and dance the night away...

 The eighth grade dance was the after party that was before this year.  Julia got herself ready at a friends house, so I never saw her until it was over.  By the time she got home, her hair was a mess from the humidity.  She had a great time, and I am grateful for sweet friends who share the pictures they take.

cheer friends

friends since preschool

another cheer friend

A Tale of Two Dresses

From the start of her eighth grade year, Julia has looked forward to two events - crossover and the after-party.  Just a little school history:Julia's school does not do an 8th grade graduation.  They feel that is inappropriate, and graduation ceremonies exist at the end of high school and for college programs. They do celebrate kindergarten graduation.  They have a fifth grade celebration, but it is not a graduation, and they have 8th grade crossover where the students cross over from 8th grade into high school.  The dress code for the crossover ceremony is dressy but not formal.  Julia has been scoping dresses since the start of the year.  The after-party is something the parents do and is not always a sure thing.  Zach's class didn't have one.  Savannah's class did.  There is some confusion over whether Wyatt's class had one, but he was not invited if they did.  I really don't think they had one.  Julia insisted that she would also need an after-party dress.  Because her crossover dress does not meet dress code and will have to be covered with a sweater, I encouraged her to wear it for both events,  but who can argue with an 8th grade girl about wardrobe?  I do get it, but even Princess Kate wore an outfit to the royal wedding that she's already worn publicly twice.  Times are changing even for the rich and famous.

Finding the dresses turned out to be easy.  I took Julia for a photo shoot, so you can enjoy a sneak peek.  

The Crossover Dress

The Crossover dress - Julia found this one on a website called Saved by the Dress.  Her friends were having success shopping there, so we gave it a try.  This dress had a lace-like fringe around the top and sides that Julia did not like, so I tucked it under and stitched it down.  The downside to a web order is that Julia probably could have gone down a size, but we played it safe.  Another downside- the dress came folded in a bag and too wrinkled to shake out.  In addition to paying to have it hemmed to the right length, I had to take it to the cleaners to be pressed because I did not trust my iron on the fabric.  

I do not remember any of the other girls wearing long dresses to the ceremony in the past, but maxi dresses are the way to go when the style is short even on short girls, and the school says the dress must reach the knees.  Designers, please help us out and stop this short madness!

Julia even practiced her hair for the event.  

The After-Party Dress

(Because of scheduling conflicts with the planning committee, Julia's class is actually having a Before-Party)

The before- party dress does not have to fit any dress code except Andy's, Julia's, and mine.  Both Julia and I think the dress is too short, but we are out of time to see a seamstress about adding a coordinating ribbon of fabric around the bottom.  Finding this dress was easy.  Julia and I were wandering through the mall for the heck of it when we happened upon this dress at Charlotte Russe. Because we both liked it, she tried it on.  However, they did not have her size.  I hunted down a good coupon and ordered it online.

This photo session was a little harder.  We had better lighting but took so long that we butted up against a storm, and the humidity really caused some shininess on Julia's face near the end, so some of my favorite backdrops did not work out so well.  I, do however, love these two shots.  They are my favorites out of both sessions even if they don't actually show off the dress.

All the Good Stuff

Personally, my last two weeks have been rough.  Work is overwhelming right now, and May is one of the busiest months of the year as the school year wraps up with lots of end of year evening events.

However, there have been some highs -mostly related to Wyatt, so here's the recap of three, fun evening events.

The band concert was fantastic! They did this multi-media presentation of a piece called Godzilla, and it was AMAZING!  Wyatt's band did very well too.  I didn't post several weeks ago when Wyatt performed in the end of year percussion concert.  He played timpani for the first time and CRUSHED IT!  That was a really long concert and a long night but so cool to see my boy do so well.

The track season finished with the banquet.  Coach D, pictured here with Wyatt, shared that Wyatt improved over the season, and we all laughed about how Coach D saw Wyatt just before practice in the hallway one day and told Wyatt he'd see him in a few at practice. Wyatt's response, "I won't be there.  It's raining.  I don't run in the rain."  Wyatt has been warned that that won't fly for Cross Country season:) Wyatt likes track, but he does not like the meets because they are long.  For that reason he prefers Cross Country.  Wyatt is so ready for summer and wants to go to the pool the day it opens.

Out of the blue we got an email about an underclassman award ceremony. We have two grads from the school and have never heard of such a thing - must be new.  Our email gave us the date and time and said Wyatt would be getting an award.  Problem: Andy had a meeting scheduled at that time, and I had worked hard to get an appointment for a haircut at that time.  Andy's meeting got rescheduled, and I managed to reschedule my haircut, and how glad I am that it worked out- even better, the ceremony was short and sweet - 45 minutes long.  YES!

Wyatt was recognized in the program for receiving Honorable Mention Academic All-State for maintaining a cumulative GPA of 3.25-3.749 while participating on a Varsity team.  The real surprise of the night is detailed below. 

Wyatt received an award that the school gives to one boy and one girl from each class.  The teachers and staff vote on the recipients, and then they take the list and narrow it down.  They had some ties in the other classes, but in Wyatt's class, there were no ties.  Wyatt received the Student of Character Award promoted by Christian Educators Association International.  The description on the award reads: Wyatt has been recognized by the faculty and staff of the school (school named) as displaying the following attributes: honesty, integrity, generosity, a willingness to learn new ideas, sacrificial behavior for the good of others and self-motivation based on personal faith or morals in the freshman class of 2017-2018.

I don't know if I shared before about how we discussed the reality that we cannot afford a vacation this year, and there's a certain trip the kids want to take every year of high school with our church youth.  I mentioned that we can't do both a family vacation and that trip in the coming years.  Wyatt is taking that trip this year and likely spent a whole day worrying about how he might have hurt his dad by choosing the trip.  I told Andy this, and he simply responded: I love vacation, but I love Wyatt more!  

Wyatt's heart slays me!  He certainly is deserving of this award.

Do you share clothes with your daughter?

If she weren't so funny and charming, the stories I am about to share would be annoying.  Instead they are just funny.

After seeing some of my mom friends wearing the new trend in jackets, I decided I wanted a new jacket.  Initially, this was to be for the DC trip, and I found just the right jacket at Old Navy - an Army green field jacket.  However, the local stores did not show any inventory online, and the price was not right for an online order.  Said jacket did not make it into my wardrobe before the DC trip.  After we arrived at home, I was able to find it locally and for a very good deal.  At that point I had decided to make it a Mother's Day request, but the deal was too irresistible to pass up. I purchased the jacket almost too late since it appears that spring will not be visiting this year, and winter stuck around to greet summer.  I called it my Mother's Day gift to myself.

So last week Julia bounds into my bedroom and asks, "Where's your new jacket?  I think I am going to wear it this weekend."
Um, excuse me?  Did I agree to some kind of joint ownership?  We have had a lot of fun laughing over this one.
She did wear it to church on Sunday.  I meant to snap a picture, but I did not.  If we are doing the "who wore it best" thing, I don't want to compete with Julia.

Then this happened:
In January I used my free shipping to send Savannah an order from Kohl's.  When I ordered Andy's Valentine's gift, and it was delivered to Savannah, I realized that somehow my app had changed my default address to her address.  I made a mental note to fix that with my next order, and I am sure you can guess where this is going.  I have lots of t-shirts and some dressy blouses, and not much in between.  When preparing for the DC trip, I needed some in-between shirts.  I ordered a few to try from Kohl's, and they went to Savannah.  I mean I can't remember what I did this morning (actually this morning was kind of dramatic, so I remember, but in general I can't remember what I did in the morning by the time the afternoon rolls around), so how am I supposed to remember a mental note from two months ago?  Anyway, I did not get my shirts for DC.  I finally got them last week when we picked up Savannah from school.  Julia immediately loved one of them and has informed me that she will be borrowing it.  It would swallow her. It's big on me, and I am not as small as my girls.  She's convinced though that she will be wearing it. Again on that "who wore it best thing"...