Andy and I were married 17 years ago today. This is the story of our love.
While attending college in a town about an hour and and a half from home, I found a job I loved through a friend. Because I liked the job so well, I stayed over the summer in my college town. However, just before my fifth year (education is like a double major, so even with a full course load, it is hard to get out in four years), the doctor's office where I worked hired a temp, and I just could not work with her. Risking my job, I left for home for the summer. This is where some divine intervention took place.
I left my college town and college boyfriend and opted to wait tables at a Mexican restaurant. Unbeknownst to me, a very good high school friend also secured a job at the same restaurant. We started our training with two other people. Andy was one of them. He also was home from his college and had bused tables at the restaurant in the past but had reached the age where he could serve alcohol and therefore wait tables. Andy had the look of a rebel. He dressed like a hippie and knew the crew, so he maneuvered through the restaurant with confidence. I was attracted to him almost immediately. I told my friend Kim that I hoped to kiss Andy by the end of the summer.
Restaurants are dark places where parties among the staff are abundant. The group invited us to one of their favorite places to hang out after work, a bar that stayed open most of the night. Kim was unable to go at the last minute, and the only other person I even remotely knew was Andy. We ended up talking most of the night. He personally invited me to another outing with just a few crew members including his sister shortly thereafter. Soon we had added a movie date and a dinner date to our outings, and Andy called me to say he wanted us to be an exclusive item. Oops, I needed to make a phone call and end my relationship with the guy I had been dating. In all honesty we never dated exclusively. I think I knew that I could not marry him and kept my options open, so I made that call and Andy and I continued to date.
Summer wasn't even over when I knew he was the one. Our talks of marriage started very early in our relationship. By the end of October, we were engaged. Our relationship continued through cards, letters, and phone calls across the miles as our colleges were about three hours apart. We probably would have waited two years to marry except that my sister was also engaged. Tiffany and I decided that we would not put our parents through two weddings in two years, so we started planning a double wedding which really sped things up for Andy and me. At some point Tiffany's fiance decided that he did not want me planning their wedding. Tiffany told him that he did not have to worry as she would not be marrying him, so I would not be planning his wedding... a good decision on her part, I might add.
For reasons I don't really know, the ball kept rolling for Andy and me, and we were married just over a year after we started dating. I used to say that we should have waited another year. Andy, however, was always convinced that we would not have married had we waited. Our first year of marriage was tough. I started teaching in my hometown. The first year of teaching is brutal for most teachers, and I had much additional stress. To this day I still refer to it as the worst year of my life which bothers Andy a bit since it was our first year of marriage. Andy attended his college, traveling to stay there during the week and working at home on the weekends. I worked a second job so that we could make ends meet. Our marriage started off poorly as I was really angry with Andy over the planning of our honeymoon and working a grueling schedule that basically left me without a life. In addition we both made a huge mistake when we took in a friend of his to help her out and to help us financially. I really thought we would end up divorced. My advice to a young married couple would be that that they should not have any roommates. That's a recipe for disaster, and our roommate wasn't even home much!
After we survived the first year, things just got better. Andy and I traded places, and he worked two jobs until Savannah was born. When he stopped that, he told a friend that he would never do that to his family again as it is much too hard on a family. That friend moved out of state in order to stop the the two job rat race. We still had our bumps in the road, but somehow we made it. Life really changed for us in 2002 when Andy attended a retreat at our church. It completely changed him, and I went from having a great husband to a phenomenal husband. I would like to attend the retreat myself, but scheduling and finances have kept me away every year.
From the start we had a dog. We picked up Molly right after our return from our honeymoon, and she brought us much joy in her four short years of life.
Oh my! the hair! enough said
This is a favorite picture of mine, but poor Savannah is so fair and tiny that she is practically washed out.
We don't usually celebrate our anniversary. It has fallen aside along with our birthdays, but we do have a restaurant gift certificate that I think we will use tonight. With my new work schedule, I have hardly seen Andy this week. I have to go to work in an hour and a half, and he isn't even up because he is on call and was up at 4:00a.m. working on some mess. I think we need a night to ourselves.
