Wyatt's Self portrait

Wyatt recently brought this self-portrait home. I want to let you in on a couple of interesting facts on this piece of work. Apparently, it is not finished. Wyatt produced this in an after school art class from which he played hooky on his own initiative two weeks in a row. Did he ever get in trouble for that!? First, when he is not expected to be on the bus, Mom is not there to meet him. Second, this class was pricey, and he asked to take it which we obliged so that he could continue to work on his weak motor skills. Third, he came home in deliberate disobedience to his teacher who told him to go to art.


The other interesting thing about this picture is that on the prompting of his classmates, he gave himself an earring. He erased it, but it is still quite visible. Wyatt thought this was hysterical. It was funnier still when I surprised even Savannah by pointing out the hole in Andy's ear that gives away the fact that once upon a time he wore an earring. Family secrets do come out of the bag, aye?!

my big-hearted sister

That's my biker-chick mom with my sister Tessa.

My sister Tessa is raising money for pancreatic cancer. If you feel led to donate money to help with with the under-funded research for this rare cancer, here is the link to Tessa's page: www.pancreatic.org/memorial/Todd
Tessa is doing this in honor of my mom who, as you now know, has pancreatic cancer. If she raises $1000.00 by April 25th, Tessa will have her head shaved while singing Sinead O'Connor's Nothing Compares to You. To my knowledge Tessa cannot sing, so this should be funny, and she is willing to have it videotaped to be posted on youtube. My sister has a big and generous heart, and I hope she succeeds at meeting her goal.

Jr. Cotillion

Zachary and Savannah completed their cotillion season with the Grand Spring Ball last night. We were late arriving for the parent's part of the dance. Andy struggled to pull himself away from the NCAA tournament. Unfortunately, that meant that he missed the father/daughter dance which was the only part of the ball that interested Savannah. The mothers and sons were dancing when we arrived, so I encouraged them to go ahead and dance. I found Zachary and danced with him for about half a song. I then tried to convince Savannah that we could redeem this if she would return next year. No go on that one, but she did have fun at the ball.

longing

Will I ever see a Chinese toddler without longing to return to adopt again? That longing is especially strong right now as I miss the wonder of living with a toddler.

Goin' Buggy

Warning: you might just like bugs after this post.


On Thursday, the first graders at Wyatt's school performed a musical in front of a packed audience of parents, siblings, and grandparents. I do mean a packed audience as there was standing room only, and it was a hot building. However, the play was cute, cute, cute. As these little bugs campaigned for their rights to be treated well right up to a meeting with the president of the United States, they sang adorable songs. Wyatt told me prior to the performance that they were going to have a glow stick in their pockets that they couldn't get out until the right time (the lightning bug song, I learned) and that they would be wearing hats. They could keep both items after the performance, and he was so excited about all of it.


Now that is a lot of first graders!! and we all know this one little bug

stepping onto my soapbox

In January unexpected news rocked my world. After lots of tests and waiting and an incorrect diagnosis, my mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. A walnut sized tumor resides on her pancreas, and she also sports a hot spot on her liver. If chemo goes well, she may have surgery that will greatly increase her survival odds. We are praying for chemo to go well. This diagnosis shocked and devastated me. Pancreatic cancer is not unfamiliar to me. A dear friend lost her mother to it when we were seniors in college, and a colleague lost her sister to it last year. I am well aware that this is a grim diagnosis. However, I have been incredibly shocked by the responses of friends. I thought I was being overly sensitive, but when I finally shared some of these comments with my Bible study group and saw their jaws drop, I realized that I may not have over-reacted. These are some of the daggers that have pierced my heart over the last few weeks:

• You aren't getting your hopes up about that surgery, are you? If you read about it online, you will see that doctors are reluctant to do it because most people die before they recover. (Yep, online medical research is always top notch).
• If your mom isn't reacting to the chemo, then it isn't working. (I missed the announcement that you got a medical degree.)
• I will pray that your mom goes quickly without much suffering. (Thanks, but do you mind praying along with me for a miracle?)

The common thread that I found in the comments was - have you given up hope? -because you should do that now.
These are just a few examples of comments said to me. I didn't think I had my hopes up, but each time I faced one of these daggers, it stung until the sweet, renewed mercies of God came in the morning. Now, they just make me mad. I can't pretend that I have never said the wrong thing. Nor can I pretend that my words have never hurt anyone. If I have hurt you by saying the wrong thing, I am sorry. I am learning so much right now. However, I do not recall ever saying anything like the things listed above. I will say that when you care about someone on a tough journey, you can encourage them. I would rather hear:

• I am sorry.
• I know this is tough.
• I am praying for you.
• How can I help, or how can I pray?

Many of my friends have said these very things, and I am so grateful for their encouragement.
My mom is walking this journey in peace. She knows to Whom she belongs, and she is fighting for her life because life is worth the fight. She also knows; as Billy Graham said after our nation was rocked by terrorist attacks in 2001, those who have gone to Heaven would not come back to this world for anything.
As for me I am not walking around with swollen and red eyes. I am not ripping my clothes and missing work to wallow in grief. My mom is still alive, and I am still praying for a miracle from the one Who can heal her. I am not taking a pill to get through the day. I think this may be the reason for these statements. I think I have friends who think I must not get it. I get it alright! My response to the daggers may not be the best one, but it is already building. I am completing the steel walls that will protect my heart. If you ask for an update on my mom, you will get the facts and nothing more. I no longer mention this road I am on to people who don't already know. I have already seen the danger in that. I will lean in to God and family on this journey.
I am now stepping off of my soapbox.

It happened this week - Wyatt brought home the assignment that freaks out most adoptive parents..

I, however, would not be intimidated by this assignment. If you followed our journey, then you know that I claimed Galatians 5:29 over Wyatt...If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise. I explained in my letter to Wyatt on his website that this verse is an encouragement for him to embrace his heritage: both his Chinese and American heritage.

Therefore, when I read the assignment and learned we were to do a timeline of Wyatt's life with a significant event from each year, I was ready to meet that challenge head on. Sure, we have five full years of unknowns, but with a little creativity, Wyatt does not have to be set apart from his classmates.We were blessed to bring Wyatt home from an orphanage where his picture was taken regularly. We have over 250 pictures depicting Wyatt's life in China. We are still working on the translations that go with the pictures, but this gives us a start. Wyatt loves to see himself in pictures and to have those pictures in his hands, so we bordered his poster with pictures of his life in China and in America. Some events in our family impacted Wyatt whether or not he realizes it, so I listed those events regardless of his awareness of them. Honestly, what seven year old remembers all the significant events of his life?

2002 - Wyatt is born in Hefei, Anhui, China and named Lu Han Jun

2003 - since Wyatt was born so late in 2002, I skipped this year on the timeline

2004- Our family started pursuing our first adoption, and our daughter was born in China. Why is this significant in Wyatt's life? Obviously, he got a sister and best friend out of the deal, but I am also convinced that his adoption would have never happened without Julia's. Her adoption paved our path to Wyatt.

2005- Our adoption of Julia was completed.

2006-Wyatt moved to the Sunbeam Village. He attended preschool in China.

2007- We saw Wyatt's picture for the first time. The wheels were turning toward a family for this precious little guy.

2008 -What a year! I couldn't fit it all on the poster, so I left it with our travel to China and that Wyatt became a citizen of America this year.

2009 - Wyatt's family brought home a puppy.

Yep, his poster is a little bit of the HUGE and the small that makes a life.

God is good

On Thursday afternoon, I received a message on my cell phone from the surgical center where Wyatt has had his last two surgeries. I called back immediately and received the answering machine for someone in billing. Uh-OH. This was not totally unexpected as I kind of checked out of life for all of January and did not pursue the missing statement from the surgical center. I did make good in February with a payment, but my thought was that maybe it was too little, too late. My cell phone is not typically on me during the day at work, so I left a message with both my number and Andy's. I then forgot to tell Andy I had done this and had to e-mail him from work on Friday. I handle this bill, so I explained in my e-mail that if they should call, I do know that I missed a payment in January, and yes, I know that we owe more than $2000.00. I am doing the best I can. I also told him to assure them that we will not have any more surgeries for Wyatt until the bill is paid. I fully expected that to be a two year wait. It wasn't an hour later that Andy sent an e-mail that said something to the effect of "I'm blown away. I didn't know what to say. Praise God! They noted that we have paid $750.00, and since it was billed out of network, they are marking it Paid in Full." Wow oh Wow!! Our bill was for $3114.00. Never would I have imagined that they would do this. Just this week I realized that did not believe that God would do miracles for the undeserving. I have prayed for miracles with little faith that God would provide. Now I must decide just what to put in our shadow box to remember this miracle.